July 14, 2011
Today I am 49 years and 2 days old. And I’m feeling good, which is good considering the last 8 challenged-filled months. What with a hip replacement due to a cancer relapse, and having to utilize a walker, which I have ditched. YEAH for me!!!!!! My cane and I are best friends, at least outside the house. When I’m inside I don’t use it and am hoping to give it up by the end of August.
Adding to my issues my sister, Daryl, had a cancer relapse too. She’d been feeling pain in her groin area and thought it was a groin pull, well if it were only that simple. Then a knot showed up on her head, in the front of her head. She thought something had bitten her. Turns out it was a tiny tumor, which she has named Matilda, and the groin pull was actually a cracked pelvis, luckily just two small hairline fractures. So add my relapse + her relapse and you have some idea of what has been going on. But believe it or not, it is all good.
Life if unfolding as it should. Some days I have a hard time remembering that but in the end I always come back to the knowledge that what is for my highest good and Daryl’s is manifesting.
I know I sound like Pollyanna, the main character in the best-selling novel Pollyanna. The main character has an optimistic outlook on life that revolves around The Glad Game, which consists of finding something to be glad about in every situation, a fine coping skill for anyone, in my opinion. But being a Pollyanna is generally not viewed as a positive; instead it is usually a putdown and a way to belittle positivity. I do employ The Glad Game as a coping mechanism but not because I love Pollyanna, am naïve or trying to smile my problems away.
I do it because my Mother, Barbara Lee, taught me to find the silver lining in every situation. Sure there will be some circumstances that make you want to scream, pull your hair out, stomp your feet and cry. So when confronted with such a situation, scream, pull your hair out, unless of course the chemo takes care of that for you, stomp your feet and cry. Then do your hair, if there is any left or put a wig on and get on with living. At least that works for me. I have to find a silver lining in order to make it through to the other side.
Anger, denial and pessimism will do nothing but make whatever is happening worse. Don’t get me wrong I have my moments, I am human. But I have come to realize that finding a silver lining will lighten the burden and make the journey less taxing. So given the opportunity to choose between optimism and pessimism I am always going to go with positivity but that’s just me: Valerie “Pollyanna” Lee.
Live, Love & Laugh!
Until I post again make sure you get your fair share of Cupcakes & Travel Magazines!
Valerie
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