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Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Hair is not always Political or Edgy - Sometimes it is just Hair!


Hair the bane of some black women's lives. And a crown of glory for other black women. You can put me in the "crown of glory" category, thanks to my Mother. For some folks their hair is political and for others it's just about individuality. I am blessed with having hair that lets me wear it anyway I want. I can sport braids, cornrows, go natural, sew in a weave, grow some dreds, get it permed or get some dreds weaved into my head. I can change my look overnight and not thing twice about it, now that is GLORIOUS!

I like to think black women do not have to justify their hairstyles to anyone but I am realistic and know that some companies make it hard for a black woman to wear ethnic hairstyles so those women have to go along to get along. Or move on to another company. Or better yet start their own company. Alright now!

Now that all that is out of the way here we go: most of the criticism of black women's hair comes from other black women. Which brings me to Zahara, the daughter of Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt. I stumbled upon a blog the other day where the blogger, who wears her hair natural, was going on about how Angelina needs to do the child's hair. Now I, myself have had problems with white Mothers of black and bi-racial children who have no idea what to do with their child's hair. I feel if a person is going to adopt or birth a child and have no "experience" with "different" hair then that parent needs to go to a black salon, a black church, ask a black co-worker or stop a black stranger whose hair they like and ask for help in doing their baby's hair. I always say I am going to open myself a salon just for white mothers of black children and help them out. I digress. Back to Zahara.

Her parents are Angelina and Brad, movies stars and parents. They appear to be two people who love each and wanted to create a family together, which they have created with children from around the world as well as having 3 birth children. Their household is considered by most Americans non-traditional when in reality they are what should be considered traditional in my opinion. They wanted children and didn't care what the outside package looked like. They appear to love their children and want to support and encourage them to explore and try different things. All parents should want to do that. Back to Zahara's hair.

The blogger essentially said that Angelina and Brad needed to get with the program and understand that her hair is different from the other kids in the family. Well I don't think Angelina and Brad are stupid or blind - because only a stupid or blind person would not realize that Zahara's hair is different. The blogger continued by saying that when Zahara got older she wouldn't be able to look at childhood pictures without feeling bad about herself and her hair. Puhleeze! I guess that blogger has a crystal ball and can get inside Zahara's future head. I'm sure Zahara will look at her family photos as a young adult and realize how lucky she was to adopted by parents who wanted her. Plain and simple.

As a woman of color myself I understand the whole hair issue and I just want everyone to know that my wanting hair "different" from the hair the Good Lord blessed me with had nothing to do with me wanting to be white or hating myself. I just wanted to be like my Mom who is Native American. And it was that Native American woman who told me that my hair was perfect just the way it was. My Mom stepped up and made sure I felt good about my hair. All parents have to step up and make sure their children are safe, confident, loved and practice self-love. And it appears that Angelina and Brad are stepping up since they have sought out "black hair" care products like Carol's Daughter so they get credit for taking care of Zahara's hair business. In my opinion.

Then there's Willow Smith, daughter of Jada & Will Smith who is currently sporting a Mohawk hair-do. While no one is saying Willow's parents need to realize what kind of hair she has - I wish someone would step to Jada and say that...I would pay to see that interaction. What people are saying and debating is whether or not Willow's 'do is too edgy. Too edgy? Again, Puhleeze! Willow's parents are letting her explore and experiment with HER hair. As I am sure Angelina and Brad will do when it's time for Zahara to do her own 'do. Until then, I wish everyone would get out of Zahara and Willow's hair. Let individuality reign!

I hope this has been Tasty and Informative like Cupcakes & Travel Magazines!

Monday, July 5, 2010

4th of July Memories!


July 5, 2010

I hope everyone had a GREAT 4th of July - mine was good. I attended a picnic at friend's house in Stratford, CT. Not too many people, good food and good company. Just like my childhood holidays. We (my mom and sisters) used to spend the 4th in Southampton, LI - our hometown. We had a spot downstreet (local expression) where our family stood for years and watched the parade come down North Main street right past us. The family hasn't been together on the 4th in years so I know some other tribe has "our" spot. I hope their memories are as great as mine.

After the parade there was usually a cookout at my Aunt Florence (my mom's sister) and Uncle Elton's house, which was the same house my mom and her siblings were raised in. My Grandfather was married twice and my mom and her four siblings were the result of his second marriage. His first marriage blessed him with 2 children. And my mom's mother had a son when she married my grandfather. Oh yeah grand-dad was already a grandfather when he started his second family. Quick genealogy lesson on the Lee tribe. So my mom, her seven siblings, their mates and children would fill the yard where we ate the burgers grilled by one uncle or another while another uncle or cousin was boiling the water for the lobsters and crabs and still another uncle or cousin was steaming clams. And for those who liked their clams raw someone was shucking them over an over-sized garbage can filled with empty shells.

We would all eat too much and laugh a lot while grubbing on good eats. And the adults would drink until it was time to watch the (illegal) fireworks and sparklers that my uncle, who will remain unnamed to protect the guilty, would bring from the city. All in all a good time was had by everyone every year.

I hope all your past 4th of July celebrations, including yesterday, were family-fun-filled times. And if they weren't make sure to make it happen for yourself next year.